Chapter 1"Honestly, did you fuck Felicia?" A man's deep voice seeped through the door's crack, freezing me in my tracks as I was about to enter.Peering through the gap, I saw Conrad Wagner perched in his high-backed chair, his lips barely moving. "She made the moves, but I wasn't interested.""Don't trash-talk her, Conrad. Felicia's a catch in our circles. Plenty of guys are after her," the speaker was Conrad's close friend, Jefferson Daniels, who had also witnessed the ups and downs of my decade-long relationship with Conrad."It's too familiar, you know?" Conrad furrowed his brows in distaste.I was fourteen when the Wagner family took me in, meeting Conrad for the first time. Everyone told me he was the one I was supposed to marry one day. And just like that, ten years had passed with us living under the same roof."Yeah, I get it. You work together daily, barely lifting your heads from your desks, and eat at the same table at night. You guys probably know each other's bathroom schedules all too well," Jefferson mocked before sighing, "Gone are the days when familiarity breeds affection. These days, it's all about the chase, wanting what you can't have. That's what keeps things exciting."Conrad remained silent, a tacit acknowledgment of Jefferson's words."So, are you still planning to marry her?" Jefferson's question made my heart skip a beat.Conrad's parents had been pushing us to make it official, but he hadn't said yes or no. I hadn't asked him, either. But Jefferson had done it for me.Conrad didn't respond."Not planning to marry her?" Jefferson prodded with a laugh.Conrad denied it, "It's not that.""So, you want to marry her but feel like you're settling, right?" Jefferson knew Conrad inside out, having grown up together."Jefferson, ever heard the saying?" Conrad smirked faintly.Jefferson was all ears. "What saying?""It's like a tasteless meal you can't bring yourself to throw away." Conrad lit a cigarette, the smoke veiling the face I'd adored for ten years.My heart clenched painfully. To Conrad, I was just an unwanted dish."Are you going to marry her or not?" Jefferson pressed on.Conrad glanced at him, saying, "You're so curious about the answer. Got your sights on Felicia, too? How about I give her to you?"I felt like I was nothing more than an insignificant object, passed around after ten years together.Even a pet would be treated with more love. It was clear I meant nothing to Conrad. Yet, he was my everything for the last ten years. His words wounded me deeply, a bitter taste rising in my throat.Looking down at the ID, I bit my lip hard."Huh," Jefferson scoffed, "What are you saying? She’s your wife. I'm not an asshole."Conrad extinguished his cigarette and stood up from the sofa. "Get out. You've been nothing but a nuisance since you arrived.""It's not me who's bothering you, but Felicia. If you have no feelings for her, it’s better to break it off and let her find someone who truly appreciates her," Jefferson said, grabbing his coat and heading for the door.As he opened it and saw me standing there, his expression froze before he awkwardly rubbed his nose, realizing I had overheard their conversation.He forced a smile. "Looking for Conrad? He's inside."My fingers numbed around the certificate, unable to speak.Glimpsing what I held, Jefferson's lips twitched. He leaned in. "Think carefully about what you want."He brushed past me, leaving me standing with the ID heavy in my hands. It took a moment to pull myself together before I pushed the door open and stepped inside.Conrad looked up at the sound of my voice, his gaze landing on my face.I didn’t need a mirror to know I must have looked pale."Not feeling well?" His brows furrowed slightly.Silently, I walked to his desk, swallowing the bitter taste in my throat. "If you don't want to marry me, I can tell Jacqueline."The wrinkles between Conrad's brows deepened. He knew I had overheard his conversation with Jefferson.My throat felt salty. "I didn't expect to become an unwanted dish, Conrad...""In everyone's eyes, we're already husband and wife," Conrad interrupted.So what? Was he marrying me for everyone else? I wanted him to marry me because he loved me and wanted to spend his life with me.With a snap, Conrad closed his pen, his gaze falling on the ID in my hand. "We'll go get the marriage license next Wednesday."It was what I wanted to hear. But at that moment, it made me feel terrible.I lowered my head, shaking it. "Conrad, you don't have to force yourself. I don't need your charity.""Felicia!" Conrad called my name with a weighty tone.I trembled, looking up to meet his impatient eyes as he reached out his hand toward me.My grip tightened on the ID. His jaw clenched. "Give it to me."I didn't move, the atmosphere tensing.Seconds later, Conrad stood up, his tall figure looming over me, and he sighed lightly, a hint of resignation in his voice, "I was just joking with Jefferson. Did you take it seriously?"Was it all just a joke?"You know how men need to save face." His hand grasped my arm, then slid down to take my hand, pulling the ID away."Don't jump to conclusions in the future." Conrad turned, placed my ID in a drawer, and grabbed his jacket. "I need to step out."Lately, he always seemed to be going out and would be gone for hours each time."Conrad," I called after him, "do you like me?"Conrad stopped beside me, his sharp eyes locking onto mine. After a moment, he smiled, his dimple flashing briefly on his left cheek. Conrad had a beautiful smile, warm and inviting. When I first joined the Wagner family, he approached me with that smile, calling me "little one." That smile warmed me and made me fall for him hopelessly. Even at the time, I still loved his smile.He gently ruffled my hair. "I do. Why else would I drive across the city to get you desserts, send you roses every birthday, watch meteor showers with you, and marry you?"Every time I hesitated, a smile from Conrad and a few reassuring words would put me at ease. I was like a kite, with him firmly holding the string, controlling my emotions at his whim. But the words I had overheard still affected me.This time, I wasn't as easy to soothe as before.Looking into Conrad’s eyes, I asked, "Is it the romantic feeling a man has for a woman?"At that, the hand in my hair paused, and his smile faded. His hand dropped to my cheek, gently pinching. "Don't overthink it. We'll go home together after work. You like salmon, don’t you? I had someone bring fresh salmon. I'll cook it for dinner."He left, just like many times before, avoiding my questions. The scent of his hand cream lingered on my nose, his warmth still on my cheek, but my heart was cold. He was kind to me, pampered me, and liked me, but his affections felt more fraternal than romantic. Yet, my heart was entirely his, having adored him for ten years.So, what should I do? Should I marry him and settle into a passionless life, as familiar with each other as an old married couple with no interest in intimacy? Or should I leave him, letting him find the spark that would excite his heart?My brain got stuck in a loop all day, wrestling with this issue that refused to budge. Even when Conrad came by to pick me up in the afternoon, I was still clueless. But I went along anyway.The habit was a scary thing. Over a decade, I had grown so used to Conrad and returning to the Wagner family after work."What's up with the silence?" Conrad sensed my mood because he broke the quiet on the way.I hesitated for seconds. "Conrad, maybe we should just..."I couldn't even finish my sentence before his phone went off. The car's Bluetooth showed an anonymous number lighting up the screen, and I noticed Conrad's grip on the steering wheel tightened. He was nervous, a rare sight.Instinctively, I glanced at his face, but he was already dismissing the call on the car system, switching to his mobile's Bluetooth. "Hello... Okay, I'm on my way."The call was brief. After hanging up, Conrad glanced over at me. "Felicia, something's come up. I can't take you home."I knew it before he said he was going to ditch me. It wasn't the first time. But still, part of me had hoped he'd drop me first.A sharp pang of hurt hit me, but I swallowed my sadness. "Is everything okay?"Conrad tightened his jaw and stayed silent, just gazing through the windshield. "You can get out here and take a cab home."He didn’t even bother to give me a proper explanation, just a dismissal. What else could I say? To probe or to fuss would just be embarrassing myself."Text me when you get home," Conrad said as he pulled over to a temporary parking spot on the side of the road.I gripped my bag tighter and got off. It wasn't just my sensitivity. I had a feeling from when Conrad saw the incoming call to his refusal to answer it in my presence. But I didn't ask, nor did I say anything. Some truths were like a thin sheet of glass, kept intact only for self-deception."Be careful on your way!" He tossed me the line in a rush but eventually sped off.I stood there, watching him drive away until my eyes began to sting, and I finally looked down at my feet.My phone buzzed in my pocket, a call from my best friend, Fanny Willis."Hey, where are you? Dinner tonight?" she asked.As a young and brilliant gynecologist, Fanny didn't have a boyfriend yet, but her medical skills were renowned."Sure," I answered, surprising myself with my eagerness.Fanny immediately teased, "The sun must be rising from the west today! Usually, you'd ask Conrad first. What's up? You're so spontaneous today."Her words squeezed my heart. I'd lived in Conrad's shadow for ten years, even needing his permission to dine out with my best friend, afraid he'd worry if he couldn't find me. But today, Conrad made it clear I was a burden to him."Are you at the hospital or home?" I deflected instead of answering.Fanny gave me an address and told me to come over."What happened? Did you fight with Mr. Wagner?" Fanny noticed something was off the moment she saw me.She was one of my few friends, and I didn't hide the truth from her.After hearing my story, Fanny cursed, "Men are all the same, aren't they? Thinks he's had enough of you? As if he's been with you so many times before."Her words didn't comfort me. Instead, they embarrassed me.Despite my long relationship with Conrad, we had never been intimate. There was a time I drunkenly tried to seduce him, but he just wrapped me up and put me back in my room. I used to think Conrad respected me, not wanting to take advantage when I wasn't sober. Today, I realized he just wasn't interested. They said if a man truly loved a woman, he'd desire her. But Conrad never showed that kind of desire for me.I said, "Fanny, I want to let go."The dilemma that had plagued me all day suddenly seemed clear."Good, I support you," Fanny raised her glass to mine. "Get over him. There are plenty of fish in the sea. With your looks, you can get anyone you want."Fanny was right. At eighteen, I had won a beauty pageant. If it weren't for Conrad, I might have been a star by then. With my beauty, I'd had countless admirers these years, but I'd never been interested. All I wanted was Conrad.That thought made my heart ache, and to hide my true feelings from Fanny, I rushed to the restroom. But I collided with someone coming out, knocking him over and landing on top of him.Before I could even apologize, that man screamed, "She’s touching me! We’ve got a pervert here..."Chapter 2"Honestly, did you fuck Felicia?" A man's deep voice seeped through the door's crack, freezing me in my tracks as I was about to enter.Peering through the gap, I saw Conrad Wagner perched in his high-backed chair, his lips barely moving. "She made the moves, but I wasn't interested.""Don't trash-talk her, Conrad. Felicia's a catch in our circles. Plenty of guys are after her," the speaker was Conrad's close friend, Jefferson Daniels, who had also witnessed the ups and downs of my decade-long relationship with Conrad."It's too familiar, you know?" Conrad furrowed his brows in distaste.I was fourteen when the Wagner family took me in, meeting Conrad for the first time. Everyone told me he was the one I was supposed to marry one day. And just like that, ten years had passed with us living under the same roof."Yeah, I get it. You work together daily, barely lifting your heads from your desks, and eat at the same table at night. You guys probably know each other's bathroom schedules all too well," Jefferson mocked before sighing, "Gone are the days when familiarity breeds affection. These days, it's all about the chase, wanting what you can't have. That's what keeps things exciting."Conrad remained silent, a tacit acknowledgment of Jefferson's words."So, are you still planning to marry her?" Jefferson's question made my heart skip a beat.Conrad's parents had been pushing us to make it official, but he hadn't said yes or no. I hadn't asked him, either. But Jefferson had done it for me.Conrad didn't respond."Not planning to marry her?" Jefferson prodded with a laugh.Conrad denied it, "It's not that.""So, you want to marry her but feel like you're settling, right?" Jefferson knew Conrad inside out, having grown up together."Jefferson, ever heard the saying?" Conrad smirked faintly.Jefferson was all ears. "What saying?""It's like a tasteless meal you can't bring yourself to throw away." Conrad lit a cigarette, the smoke veiling the face I'd adored for ten years.My heart clenched painfully. To Conrad, I was just an unwanted dish."Are you going to marry her or not?" Jefferson pressed on.Conrad glanced at him, saying, "You're so curious about the answer. Got your sights on Felicia, too? How about I give her to you?"I felt like I was nothing more than an insignificant object, passed around after ten years together.Even a pet would be treated with more love. It was clear I meant nothing to Conrad. Yet, he was my everything for the last ten years. His words wounded me deeply, a bitter taste rising in my throat.Looking down at the ID, I bit my lip hard."Huh," Jefferson scoffed, "What are you saying? She’s your wife. I'm not an asshole."Conrad extinguished his cigarette and stood up from the sofa. "Get out. You've been nothing but a nuisance since you arrived.""It's not me who's bothering you, but Felicia. If you have no feelings for her, it’s better to break it off and let her find someone who truly appreciates her," Jefferson said, grabbing his coat and heading for the door.As he opened it and saw me standing there, his expression froze before he awkwardly rubbed his nose, realizing I had overheard their conversation.He forced a smile. "Looking for Conrad? He's inside."My fingers numbed around the certificate, unable to speak.Glimpsing what I held, Jefferson's lips twitched. He leaned in. "Think carefully about what you want."He brushed past me, leaving me standing with the ID heavy in my hands. It took a moment to pull myself together before I pushed the door open and stepped inside.Conrad looked up at the sound of my voice, his gaze landing on my face.I didn’t need a mirror to know I must have looked pale."Not feeling well?" His brows furrowed slightly.Silently, I walked to his desk, swallowing the bitter taste in my throat. "If you don't want to marry me, I can tell Jacqueline."The wrinkles between Conrad's brows deepened. He knew I had overheard his conversation with Jefferson.My throat felt salty. "I didn't expect to become an unwanted dish, Conrad...""In everyone's eyes, we're already husband and wife," Conrad interrupted.So what? Was he marrying me for everyone else? I wanted him to marry me because he loved me and wanted to spend his life with me.With a snap, Conrad closed his pen, his gaze falling on the ID in my hand. "We'll go get the marriage license next Wednesday."It was what I wanted to hear. But at that moment, it made me feel terrible.I lowered my head, shaking it. "Conrad, you don't have to force yourself. I don't need your charity.""Felicia!" Conrad called my name with a weighty tone.I trembled, looking up to meet his impatient eyes as he reached out his hand toward me.My grip tightened on the ID. His jaw clenched. "Give it to me."I didn't move, the atmosphere tensing.Seconds later, Conrad stood up, his tall figure looming over me, and he sighed lightly, a hint of resignation in his voice, "I was just joking with Jefferson. Did you take it seriously?"Was it all just a joke?"You know how men need to save face." His hand grasped my arm, then slid down to take my hand, pulling the ID away."Don't jump to conclusions in the future." Conrad turned, placed my ID in a drawer, and grabbed his jacket. "I need to step out."Lately, he always seemed to be going out and would be gone for hours each time."Conrad," I called after him, "do you like me?"Conrad stopped beside me, his sharp eyes locking onto mine. After a moment, he smiled, his dimple flashing briefly on his left cheek. Conrad had a beautiful smile, warm and inviting. When I first joined the Wagner family, he approached me with that smile, calling me "little one." That smile warmed me and made me fall for him hopelessly. Even at the time, I still loved his smile.He gently ruffled my hair. "I do. Why else would I drive across the city to get you desserts, send you roses every birthday, watch meteor showers with you, and marry you?"Every time I hesitated, a smile from Conrad and a few reassuring words would put me at ease. I was like a kite, with him firmly holding the string, controlling my emotions at his whim. But the words I had overheard still affected me.This time, I wasn't as easy to soothe as before.Looking into Conrad’s eyes, I asked, "Is it the romantic feeling a man has for a woman?"At that, the hand in my hair paused, and his smile faded. His hand dropped to my cheek, gently pinching. "Don't overthink it. We'll go home together after work. You like salmon, don’t you? I had someone bring fresh salmon. I'll cook it for dinner."He left, just like many times before, avoiding my questions. The scent of his hand cream lingered on my nose, his warmth still on my cheek, but my heart was cold. He was kind to me, pampered me, and liked me, but his affections felt more fraternal than romantic. Yet, my heart was entirely his, having adored him for ten years.So, what should I do? Should I marry him and settle into a passionless life, as familiar with each other as an old married couple with no interest in intimacy? Or should I leave him, letting him find the spark that would excite his heart?My brain got stuck in a loop all day, wrestling with this issue that refused to budge. Even when Conrad came by to pick me up in the afternoon, I was still clueless. But I went along anyway.The habit was a scary thing. Over a decade, I had grown so used to Conrad and returning to the Wagner family after work."What's up with the silence?" Conrad sensed my mood because he broke the quiet on the way.I hesitated for seconds. "Conrad, maybe we should just..."I couldn't even finish my sentence before his phone went off. The car's Bluetooth showed an anonymous number lighting up the screen, and I noticed Conrad's grip on the steering wheel tightened. He was nervous, a rare sight.Instinctively, I glanced at his face, but he was already dismissing the call on the car system, switching to his mobile's Bluetooth. "Hello... Okay, I'm on my way."The call was brief. After hanging up, Conrad glanced over at me. "Felicia, something's come up. I can't take you home."I knew it before he said he was going to ditch me. It wasn't the first time. But still, part of me had hoped he'd drop me first.A sharp pang of hurt hit me, but I swallowed my sadness. "Is everything okay?"Conrad tightened his jaw and stayed silent, just gazing through the windshield. "You can get out here and take a cab home."He didn’t even bother to give me a proper explanation, just a dismissal. What else could I say? To probe or to fuss would just be embarrassing myself."Text me when you get home," Conrad said as he pulled over to a temporary parking spot on the side of the road.I gripped my bag tighter and got off. It wasn't just my sensitivity. I had a feeling from when Conrad saw the incoming call to his refusal to answer it in my presence. But I didn't ask, nor did I say anything. Some truths were like a thin sheet of glass, kept intact only for self-deception."Be careful on your way!" He tossed me the line in a rush but eventually sped off.I stood there, watching him drive away until my eyes began to sting, and I finally looked down at my feet.My phone buzzed in my pocket, a call from my best friend, Fanny Willis."Hey, where are you? Dinner tonight?" she asked.As a young and brilliant gynecologist, Fanny didn't have a boyfriend yet, but her medical skills were renowned."Sure," I answered, surprising myself with my eagerness.Fanny immediately teased, "The sun must be rising from the west today! Usually, you'd ask Conrad first. What's up? You're so spontaneous today."Her words squeezed my heart. I'd lived in Conrad's shadow for ten years, even needing his permission to dine out with my best friend, afraid he'd worry if he couldn't find me. But today, Conrad made it clear I was a burden to him."Are you at the hospital or home?" I deflected instead of answering.Fanny gave me an address and told me to come over."What happened? Did you fight with Mr. Wagner?" Fanny noticed something was off the moment she saw me.She was one of my few friends, and I didn't hide the truth from her.After hearing my story, Fanny cursed, "Men are all the same, aren't they? Thinks he's had enough of you? As if he's been with you so many times before."Her words didn't comfort me. Instead, they embarrassed me.Despite my long relationship with Conrad, we had never been intimate. There was a time I drunkenly tried to seduce him, but he just wrapped me up and put me back in my room. I used to think Conrad respected me, not wanting to take advantage when I wasn't sober. Today, I realized he just wasn't interested. They said if a man truly loved a woman, he'd desire her. But Conrad never showed that kind of desire for me.I said, "Fanny, I want to let go."The dilemma that had plagued me all day suddenly seemed clear."Good, I support you," Fanny raised her glass to mine. "Get over him. There are plenty of fish in the sea. With your looks, you can get anyone you want."Fanny was right. At eighteen, I had won a beauty pageant. If it weren't for Conrad, I might have been a star by then. With my beauty, I'd had countless admirers these years, but I'd never been interested. All I wanted was Conrad.That thought made my heart ache, and to hide my true feelings from Fanny, I rushed to the restroom. But I collided with someone coming out, knocking him over and landing on top of him.Before I could even apologize, that man screamed, "She’s touching me! We’ve got a pervert here..."Chapter 3"Honestly, did you fuck Felicia?" A man's deep voice seeped through the door's crack, freezing me in my tracks as I was about to enter.Peering through the gap, I saw Conrad Wagner perched in his high-backed chair, his lips barely moving. "She made the moves, but I wasn't interested.""Don't trash-talk her, Conrad. Felicia's a catch in our circles. Plenty of guys are after her," the speaker was Conrad's close friend, Jefferson Daniels, who had also witnessed the ups and downs of my decade-long relationship with Conrad."It's too familiar, you know?" Conrad furrowed his brows in distaste.I was fourteen when the Wagner family took me in, meeting Conrad for the first time. Everyone told me he was the one I was supposed to marry one day. And just like that, ten years had passed with us living under the same roof."Yeah, I get it. You work together daily, barely lifting your heads from your desks, and eat at the same table at night. You guys probably know each other's bathroom schedules all too well," Jefferson mocked before sighing, "Gone are the days when familiarity breeds affection. These days, it's all about the chase, wanting what you can't have. That's what keeps things exciting."Conrad remained silent, a tacit acknowledgment of Jefferson's words."So, are you still planning to marry her?" Jefferson's question made my heart skip a beat.Conrad's parents had been pushing us to make it official, but he hadn't said yes or no. I hadn't asked him, either. But Jefferson had done it for me.Conrad didn't respond."Not planning to marry her?" Jefferson prodded with a laugh.Conrad denied it, "It's not that.""So, you want to marry her but feel like you're settling, right?" Jefferson knew Conrad inside out, having grown up together."Jefferson, ever heard the saying?" Conrad smirked faintly.Jefferson was all ears. "What saying?""It's like a tasteless meal you can't bring yourself to throw away." Conrad lit a cigarette, the smoke veiling the face I'd adored for ten years.My heart clenched painfully. To Conrad, I was just an unwanted dish."Are you going to marry her or not?" Jefferson pressed on.Conrad glanced at him, saying, "You're so curious about the answer. Got your sights on Felicia, too? How about I give her to you?"I felt like I was nothing more than an insignificant object, passed around after ten years together.Even a pet would be treated with more love. It was clear I meant nothing to Conrad. Yet, he was my everything for the last ten years. His words wounded me deeply, a bitter taste rising in my throat.Looking down at the ID, I bit my lip hard."Huh," Jefferson scoffed, "What are you saying? She’s your wife. I'm not an asshole."Conrad extinguished his cigarette and stood up from the sofa. "Get out. You've been nothing but a nuisance since you arrived.""It's not me who's bothering you, but Felicia. If you have no feelings for her, it’s better to break it off and let her find someone who truly appreciates her," Jefferson said, grabbing his coat and heading for the door.As he opened it and saw me standing there, his expression froze before he awkwardly rubbed his nose, realizing I had overheard their conversation.He forced a smile. "Looking for Conrad? He's inside."My fingers numbed around the certificate, unable to speak.Glimpsing what I held, Jefferson's lips twitched. He leaned in. "Think carefully about what you want."He brushed past me, leaving me standing with the ID heavy in my hands. It took a moment to pull myself together before I pushed the door open and stepped inside.Conrad looked up at the sound of my voice, his gaze landing on my face.I didn’t need a mirror to know I must have looked pale."Not feeling well?" His brows furrowed slightly.Silently, I walked to his desk, swallowing the bitter taste in my throat. "If you don't want to marry me, I can tell Jacqueline."The wrinkles between Conrad's brows deepened. He knew I had overheard his conversation with Jefferson.My throat felt salty. "I didn't expect to become an unwanted dish, Conrad...""In everyone's eyes, we're already husband and wife," Conrad interrupted.So what? Was he marrying me for everyone else? I wanted him to marry me because he loved me and wanted to spend his life with me.With a snap, Conrad closed his pen, his gaze falling on the ID in my hand. "We'll go get the marriage license next Wednesday."It was what I wanted to hear. But at that moment, it made me feel terrible.I lowered my head, shaking it. "Conrad, you don't have to force yourself. I don't need your charity.""Felicia!" Conrad called my name with a weighty tone.I trembled, looking up to meet his impatient eyes as he reached out his hand toward me.My grip tightened on the ID. His jaw clenched. "Give it to me."I didn't move, the atmosphere tensing.Seconds later, Conrad stood up, his tall figure looming over me, and he sighed lightly, a hint of resignation in his voice, "I was just joking with Jefferson. Did you take it seriously?"Was it all just a joke?"You know how men need to save face." His hand grasped my arm, then slid down to take my hand, pulling the ID away."Don't jump to conclusions in the future." Conrad turned, placed my ID in a drawer, and grabbed his jacket. "I need to step out."Lately, he always seemed to be going out and would be gone for hours each time."Conrad," I called after him, "do you like me?"Conrad stopped beside me, his sharp eyes locking onto mine. After a moment, he smiled, his dimple flashing briefly on his left cheek. Conrad had a beautiful smile, warm and inviting. When I first joined the Wagner family, he approached me with that smile, calling me "little one." That smile warmed me and made me fall for him hopelessly. Even at the time, I still loved his smile.He gently ruffled my hair. "I do. Why else would I drive across the city to get you desserts, send you roses every birthday, watch meteor showers with you, and marry you?"Every time I hesitated, a smile from Conrad and a few reassuring words would put me at ease. I was like a kite, with him firmly holding the string, controlling my emotions at his whim. But the words I had overheard still affected me.This time, I wasn't as easy to soothe as before.Looking into Conrad’s eyes, I asked, "Is it the romantic feeling a man has for a woman?"At that, the hand in my hair paused, and his smile faded. His hand dropped to my cheek, gently pinching. "Don't overthink it. We'll go home together after work. You like salmon, don’t you? I had someone bring fresh salmon. I'll cook it for dinner."He left, just like many times before, avoiding my questions. The scent of his hand cream lingered on my nose, his warmth still on my cheek, but my heart was cold. He was kind to me, pampered me, and liked me, but his affections felt more fraternal than romantic. Yet, my heart was entirely his, having adored him for ten years.So, what should I do? Should I marry him and settle into a passionless life, as familiar with each other as an old married couple with no interest in intimacy? Or should I leave him, letting him find the spark that would excite his heart?My brain got stuck in a loop all day, wrestling with this issue that refused to budge. Even when Conrad came by to pick me up in the afternoon, I was still clueless. But I went along anyway.The habit was a scary thing. Over a decade, I had grown so used to Conrad and returning to the Wagner family after work."What's up with the silence?" Conrad sensed my mood because he broke the quiet on the way.I hesitated for seconds. "Conrad, maybe we should just..."I couldn't even finish my sentence before his phone went off. The car's Bluetooth showed an anonymous number lighting up the screen, and I noticed Conrad's grip on the steering wheel tightened. He was nervous, a rare sight.Instinctively, I glanced at his face, but he was already dismissing the call on the car system, switching to his mobile's Bluetooth. "Hello... Okay, I'm on my way."The call was brief. After hanging up, Conrad glanced over at me. "Felicia, something's come up. I can't take you home."I knew it before he said he was going to ditch me. It wasn't the first time. But still, part of me had hoped he'd drop me first.A sharp pang of hurt hit me, but I swallowed my sadness. "Is everything okay?"Conrad tightened his jaw and stayed silent, just gazing through the windshield. "You can get out here and take a cab home."He didn’t even bother to give me a proper explanation, just a dismissal. What else could I say? To probe or to fuss would just be embarrassing myself."Text me when you get home," Conrad said as he pulled over to a temporary parking spot on the side of the road.I gripped my bag tighter and got off. It wasn't just my sensitivity. I had a feeling from when Conrad saw the incoming call to his refusal to answer it in my presence. But I didn't ask, nor did I say anything. Some truths were like a thin sheet of glass, kept intact only for self-deception."Be careful on your way!" He tossed me the line in a rush but eventually sped off.I stood there, watching him drive away until my eyes began to sting, and I finally looked down at my feet.My phone buzzed in my pocket, a call from my best friend, Fanny Willis."Hey, where are you? Dinner tonight?" she asked.As a young and brilliant gynecologist, Fanny didn't have a boyfriend yet, but her medical skills were renowned."Sure," I answered, surprising myself with my eagerness.Fanny immediately teased, "The sun must be rising from the west today! Usually, you'd ask Conrad first. What's up? You're so spontaneous today."Her words squeezed my heart. I'd lived in Conrad's shadow for ten years, even needing his permission to dine out with my best friend, afraid he'd worry if he couldn't find me. But today, Conrad made it clear I was a burden to him."Are you at the hospital or home?" I deflected instead of answering.Fanny gave me an address and told me to come over."What happened? Did you fight with Mr. Wagner?" Fanny noticed something was off the moment she saw me.She was one of my few friends, and I didn't hide the truth from her.After hearing my story, Fanny cursed, "Men are all the same, aren't they? Thinks he's had enough of you? As if he's been with you so many times before."Her words didn't comfort me. Instead, they embarrassed me.Despite my long relationship with Conrad, we had never been intimate. There was a time I drunkenly tried to seduce him, but he just wrapped me up and put me back in my room. I used to think Conrad respected me, not wanting to take advantage when I wasn't sober. Today, I realized he just wasn't interested. They said if a man truly loved a woman, he'd desire her. But Conrad never showed that kind of desire for me.I said, "Fanny, I want to let go."The dilemma that had plagued me all day suddenly seemed clear."Good, I support you," Fanny raised her glass to mine. "Get over him. There are plenty of fish in the sea. With your looks, you can get anyone you want."Fanny was right. At eighteen, I had won a beauty pageant. If it weren't for Conrad, I might have been a star by then. With my beauty, I'd had countless admirers these years, but I'd never been interested. All I wanted was Conrad.That thought made my heart ache, and to hide my true feelings from Fanny, I rushed to the restroom. But I collided with someone coming out, knocking him over and landing on top of him.Before I could even apologize, that man screamed, "She’s touching me! We’ve got a pervert here..."